Tuesday, October 31, 2006


A slice of the art adventure.

The adventure of being alone in the universe... And in New York City.

Crisis time came to the little studio apartment building nestled in the "quaint and soon to be gentrified," neighborhood of Bushwick in Brooklyn. " It all started with an e mail I received on the ol' computer thingy there." said new Bushwick resident artist Fred Haper (correction, Fred Harper) What seemed like an innocent request by a client received Saturday evening after a day of wild grocery shopping and a spontaneous trip to DSW shoes to buy some Dr. Martins. Fred came home and saw he had a nice little job from a possible new regular client from Hong Kong.

"I had plenty o' time to do ah sketch for Sundee, and get the finals done by Mondee." said Fred, who was wrapped in a blanket as he sat shivering on the back bumper of an ambulance warming his cold manicured hands and battered self esteem on a cup of hot chocolate... until the driver came back and told Fred to quit doing that! Fred picked up his tape player that was playing a compilation of Sad Songs From the 70's for mood and then left indignant.

Fred's girlfriend, Molly Crabapple (Dr. Sketchy's Rainy Day Coloring Book on sale now) came over to Fred's studio to distract him with her ambition and her new red cat collar tightly hugging her little neck. Fred lifted weights, Molly stood by with lust in her eye and details get muddled afterward.

Sunday morning. "Ah was take'n mah time ta get a nice detailed sketch for my client, I had just fixed mah scanner the other day..." Indeed. Fred spent almost an hour on tech support to fix what turned out to be a small problem easily fixed. " I got the sketches all figured out and hit scan, and... (sob)" Fred's scanner, to use a technical term, had shit the bed. (Thanks Steve W.)

Panic time. Sunday late afternoon Fred went over to Molly's and scanned in the sketches and a B&W final finished for a Phoenix paper. The sketches were now late. Final approval didn't come until 11 am Monday... THE DAY THEY WERE DUE! Back at the studio, Steve had showed up to work, Fred was almost finished with the first color spot when Phoenix called. "Do you have time to do 3 more spots?" Fred said, "Sure! When do you need them?"
" Tomorrow (Tues)"... (gulp)
" Send me the info."
Soon after, another client in Denver called with a B&W needed by Thurs.
Hong Kong was almost finished, Steve W. was ordering a new scanner. Not to mention, (until now) that Fred had finished stamping the 1200 postcards Sunday night which he dropped in the mail Monday morning. Steve had done all the labels and a good chunk of stamping the previous Wed.

Tuesday. Deadline time. Phoenix art director has a noon deadline. A crucial detail she didn't share with Fred on Monday. Fred now had about an hour to finish up the 3 extra spots and tweak the original assignment and hustle over to Molly's to use her scanner. He also had to spend an hour or 2 fixing the colors for the Hong Kong client earlier that morning. " I just wanted more espresso, but I didn't have time!" Fred was a zombie from lack of sleep and he was cranky and had the drops. Fortunately no dishes were harmed as they scuttled from hand to floor to sink...

Fred almost fell back down the stairs of the five floor walk up as he charged through the door at Molly's. She was quite breathtaking as she sat in the sunlight filtering through her plastic yellow flowers spread in front of the window by her computer. She didn't have a shred of clothing on and it would have been a crime if she had! No clothes mean less wind resistance as you put the art on the scanner. They don't mention that in the manuals. She scanned everything Fred handed her as he made espresso for the two of them. "Whew." Fred said as everything got out on time with only 4 frantic calls from Phoenix.

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